Friggin Frustrated

I am super frustrated. I work so hard. I am constantly working, working at home, or worrying about work. I also have to worry about the cleaning, organizing, and financing for the household and that is frustrating as well. I want to be able to relax when I come home. I want to come home to a clean house where I can either do some things or have an enviroment where I can rest and not have to worry about the million things I need to do. I would like a better financial situation, it is a lot of pressure for me to foot the bill for everything all the time and I am growing exhausted and maybe even a little resentful. I need more help from work, I need more help at home. I am on a fast track to crash and burn. I dont understand why I alsways get myself into situations where I am doing everything and have no time to relax and enjoy everything. This aspect of my life is one I am not happy about. I just don't know how to turn it around. I wish someone would just help me without me having to be the "bitch" all the time. Not that I am called a bitch, but I know that is what it seems like. Also, I have been told that I am "freaking out" enough lately that it makes me want to keep my mouth shut. I am so friggin tired and frustrated!

Changes

I am really not so good with change. I am not sure why this is. I would like to be a go with the flow kind of person, but I am not. Especially these shifts within myself. Lately I have been looking at the world through a new lens. It is a little disturbing. I am so conflicted I cna't seem to straighten myself out. Anxiety is rampant at this point. It is making me so tired. I want to be calm and happy- where did it go? What has changed? God it is really making me so very tired.