One way or another.....

....I'm not coming undone.

Yesterday was a total bombardment of information from hanging out with Debra, going to see Julianna, to a late night phone discussion with Ryan.

It is a lot to take in, but at least it all gives me something to work with rather than just spinning my wheels and succumbing to my own personal vortex.

I can't put it all here due to time and mental exhaustion and just the desire to keep much of it to myself.

I have drawn a few conclusions though.....

1. I am going to follow my emotions and always reach for what brings peace and relief.

2. I must cultivate myself and my own interests, both for myself (mostly for myself) and also to give another person an opportunity to get to know ME and decide weather or not they want to love ME and not the persona I think they want me to project.

3. I must open myself up to my friends and family as much as possible rather than locking myself away so much in my own thoughts.

4. I am not walking away, for now. I am just going to relax, and see what develops. I will protect my heart, but in all honesty, he is not the only one that needs things to go slow if at all.

Now, to the "first" day of school.